Sunday, May 12, 2013

For My Daughters


Happy Mother's Day to all.   I spent this day with my extraordinary daughters and just watching them makes me want to tell them so much! 

For my daughters:

  • Remember that no matter what happens in life, no matter how hard it may get- you are fully and completely loved.

  • Never doubt for one minute that you were wanted and longed for.  Being adopted never makes you second choice or second best.

  • We were meant to be together as a family, our spiritual/soul connection is deeper than biology.  Lily- on my 35th birthday I was single, ready to be a mom and confident you were waiting for me in China.  I registered that day with the adoption agency and began my quest to find you.  Avery, I was married when you came into my life.  I am so grateful to God for not giving me biological children at that point, I cannot imagine not having you as my daughter.  I never knew that I even had fertility issues until I had adopted Lily, gotten married and tried to get pregnant.  But I wouldn't change a thing about how it turned out.

  • Be good to one another, love one another, forgive one another and be the sister that you want to have in your life.  Having a sister for a best friend is a blessing beyond compare.

  • You are so much more than you even realize- you have strengths, talents and more gifts than you can imagine.  Lily- your strength and tough exterior belies a tender heart of gold and sweetness.  Avery- your sensitivity and tenderness cover up a core of steel- you are stronger and more resilient than you know.

  • Forgive, forgive, forgive others even when they haven't asked you to do so.  But most of all, forgive yourself.  You are going to make mistakes and to screw up sometimes, that is OK,  Just don't beat yourself up over it. 

  • Find and keep a circle of girlfriends- they will celebrate with you, share your pain and are more important to have in your life than you can possibly imagine.

  • To quote the amazing Dr.Maya Angelou- " When someone shows you who they are believe then the first time."  Don't believe what someone says to you (especially a romantic interest) - believe what they do and how they show you who they are.

  • Find a spiritual path and practice to strengthen your link to the Divine.

  • I am going to screw up as a mother sometimes.  I do my best but this can be a hard job.  Please forgive me when I make a mistake.

  • Be grateful for everything in you have in this crazy life.  Gratitude is the most profound form of prayer.

  • Your sexuality belongs to you and is a gift.  Don't give it away carelessly, bargain with it or use it to get ahead.  It is for you and your beloved alone.

  • You are beautiful just as you are.

  • Life is shorter than you can imagine and the older you get, time flies even faster- treasure every minute and make it matter. 

  • Happiness can be fleeting with life's ups and downs- search instead for joy.  Moments of  joy can be found every single day- sometimes it is a simple moment and sometimes it is a grand gesture.  Joy is all around us.

  • A man should never, ever hit you- period, end of story.

  • I love you beyond measure- you will learn what that really means when you become a mom.

  • I carry you in my heart- I always have- across time, geography and lifetimes- and I always will.