It has quite a while since I have blogged; life and a certain amount of writer's block have been in the way. I am inspired by this special day - when I get to rejoice in being a mommy and the connection that my daughters and I share with one another.
Some days when I get caught up in the business and busy-ness of life, the miracle of our story is not top of mind. I don't think about our journey, how I felt and knew these children were waiting for me across the ocean, how "right" and destined it felt and most of all...how everything lined up to make it happen. All of the coincidences, lost paperwork, delays in my adoption processes led me to my sweet girls. I believe that when you follow your heart and instincts you are on the right path and God and the universe line up behind you. I have never once questioned my decisions to adopt my daughters. No matter the challenges I have faced- single motherhood, divorce, financial constraints - nothing has ever felt more right and natural than being their mother. In fact, I would adopt again in a heartbeat.
Some days I have a tougher time connecting this fact to other areas of my life where frustration and disappointment crop up especially in my career or romance. After a particularly rough week, I realize that making these connections are going to be critical for me to do. Why do I feel as though some days I cannot seem to do enough, that I am off track? Am I missing something? Am I doing what I am called to do? Why do I seem to have trouble attracting the right man into my life? Why do I hang onto relationships that are not meeting my needs? Perhaps it is because I do not like what my instincts are telling me.
My fiend has an amazing website called FemCentral.. http://www.jenniferlshelton.com which is a virtual institute for women. She has a link to work by a wondeful woman named Barbara Sher- author of the classic book "Wishcraft, How to Get What You Really Want." Her new work is about finding direction and purpose in the second half of life. Her key advice is simple but brilliant " What you love is what you are gifted at. there is no other way to know who you are." Everyone has a unique vision and gift - tapping into that is the answer to finding your path. That advice resonates with me, because when you do what you love, tap into those talents and gifts - it feels natural, on track and right. Just like it did when I became a mother.
In terms of love and relationships..I have to believe that the same rules apply. When it feels right, natural and dare I say it - smooth for both of us, then perhaps we will have found one another. Certainly there are differences of opinion, challenges and times of tension in any relationship. But if at the core, you know that this is the person for you- then you are able to work through those situations. How do you know if he is that person? For me it is through what my instincts and heart (and his actions of course) are telling me. My challenges have come when I ignore those instincts. All I really need to do is follow my heart and let thoughts drift to my children. I will be reminded that if my heart and mind remain open- what is meant to be will happen.
Happy Mother's Day to all.
Sunday, May 9, 2010
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